fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I could fuck to npr.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
