Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Randomize
