So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Randomize
