Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I didn't notice because vodka
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Randomize
