Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Randomize
