does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Randomize
