Christians are straight up FREAKS
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
