Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
