I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Randomize
