okay pat passed out under dana's car
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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