Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize
