Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
