is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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