Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
