Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
