do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize