If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
