That's intense
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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