I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
