my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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