dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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