i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
