So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I got her a Nickelback box set.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize