I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
