WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
last night I used snow as a chaser
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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