He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
