I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Best friends brother. Beat that.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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