He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
