brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize