i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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