ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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