Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
