I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
