He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
