road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
It's shark week go big or go home
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
