And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
