areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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