I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Randomize
