Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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