She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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