Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
