We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
