The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Randomize
