i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
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