I can't watch pbs sober anymore
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize