Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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