so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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