he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
That accounts for only three of the penises
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
