I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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