Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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