And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
